🛏️ STAY IN BED

My daughter gave thanks for lasagna in her prayer this week. We did our best to not laugh but completely failed… What is your favorite quote you’ve heard your kid say?

Reply and let me know.

I may just include your quote in the next newsletter!

Bedtime with young kids doesn’t have to be WWIII.

But parents tend to exacerbate bedtime struggles and make it miserable for everyone.

There are tears, frustrations, and eventually poor nights of sleep for the parents and kids.

We often fall into patterns that inadvertently make bedtime more difficult. It is easy to slip into habits that send mixed signals to our kiddos.

There’s a better way to handle bedtime. Here are common bad practices parents fall into and how to solve them.

1. Inconsistent Routines

   • What Happens: Parents might change the bedtime routine or not have a routine at all. Flexibility is very important, but normal nights should have a normal routine.

   • Why It Matters: Kids thrive on predictability. Without a consistent routine, they can become anxious or resistant at bedtime.

   • Solution: Establish and stick to a consistent bedtime routine as much as possible. This might include bath time, reading a book, and/or praying.

2. Prolonging Bedtime with Negotiations

   • What Happens: Parents often give in to requests for “one more story” or “one more snack” or “five more minutes.”

   • Why It Matters: This teaches kids that bedtime is negotiable and can be delayed.

   • Solution: Set clear boundaries and stick to them. Once the routine is complete, calmly but firmly enforce bedtime.

3. Responding to Every Cry or Call

   • What Happens: Parents rush to soothe their child at the first sign of distress

   • Why It Matters: You create a dependency on parental presence to fall asleep and literally train them on how to delay bedtime. This teaches them independence and the ability to separate from you.

   • Solution: Gradually teach kids to self-soothe. Slowly reduce your involvement in bedtime and pay attention to the common ways they “play the game.” Your goal is to get them asleep quickly and without much involvement from you so you can still have an evening. Typically, your kids will be perfectly fine in their air-conditioned rooms filled with plush blankets and stuffed animals. They may need you for something, but it is RARE.

4. Inconsistent Sleep Environment

   • What Happens: Parents let their kids sleep in bed with them to stop the crying. It gives immediate gratification to both the child and parent because mom and dad can go to sleep instead of do the harder but better thing.

   • Why It Matters: They will become resistant to being in their own beds and away from you. Once they know they have the option of sleeping in your bed, they won’t be satisfied with theirs.

   • Solution: Keep the sleep environment consistent. Encourage them to stay in their own bed and don’t give into the temptation of allowing them to sleep with you. Do the right long-term thing with the end goal in mind.

Improving the bedtime routine matters, a lot.

Many couples have their one-on-one time in the evenings after the kids are in bed. When bedtime gets extended into the night, there is no time for mom and dad to connect. Doing the hard work of improving bedtime is both beneficial for the kids and puts your relationship with your spouse over your kids (which is the right priority).

Breaking the cycle of bedtime struggles takes time and patience, but the result is well worth it.

Entitled people want jobs with a salary.

But not all people with salaries are entitled.

The economy used to be run by craftsman.

You would make a product and get paid for that product. Higher quality and more volume led to more money. There was immediate gratification for high performance and your family relied on you giving it your all day in and day out. Doing the minimum led to less pay and unhappy customers.

A salary is a set amount of money for doing a job. There is no near-term difference in pay for doing the minimum or going above and beyond. The pay increase comes to those who will do the work but be patient for the reward.

This has made it rare to see people truly go above and beyond.

As leaders, this means reward high performance when you see it.

Personally, this means high quality and high volume will set you apart. Show up each day like your livelihood depends on it. Earn your pay by solving big problems that earn more profit or decrease expenses.

Thank you for reading!! Have a great week and as always, please reply with any thoughts or feedback.

God Bless,
Matt Virgin